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There are two paramount concerns when it comes to safety while participating in online dating. The first is to protect your anonymity until you can be sure it is safe to reveal personal information. The second is to protect yourself in case your online partner is using their anonymity to lie and even to scam you. Online anonymity is definitely a mixed blessing.

Personal Information to Protect.

1. First and last name. Online dating services have screen names to substitute for your real name. Many people use their first name in the screen name or they quickly give out their real first name when they begin e-mailing a potential partner. In general, it is safest to choose a screen name that doesn’t include your real name and to stick with it until you feel safe enough to reveal your full name. Remember that when people find out your name, they can access all sorts of information by googling you or looking you up in phone directories.

2. Personal e-mail address and home phone number. Dating services provide a method of swapping e-mails through the service. It is even possible to have telephone contact with the service as an intermediary. It is a good idea to stay with these anonymous methods of communication until after you have met the person once or twice and feel safe in letting them have direct access to you. For telephone contact, it is best to use a cell phone rather than giving out your home phone number.

3. Home address and employer. People who know where to find you during the day or evening may suddenly turn up at your doorstep or your job. You can prevent would-be stalkers from pursuing you by not revealing your address or place of employment.

Lies to Look Out For.

1. Age, weight, and marital status. Most people who engage in online dating will encounter frequent examples of people who posted photographs that were ten or more years old in order to hide their true age or weight. These lies are quickly recognized at the first in-person meeting. Lies about marital status may be more difficult to uncover. Someone who has difficulty agreeing on a time and place to meet or who has unusual restrictions on incoming telephone calls may well be covering up a marriage. These lies undermine the person’s credibility, but do not pose a serious threat to your safety.

2. Location and identity. Your internet correspondent may be located anywhere on the globe and may completely invent the identity they describe to you. The best safeguard against these lies is to meet the person face-to-face and get a firsthand impression. The liar will usually avoid this meeting and will come up with all kinds of reasons to justify not meeting. If you can’t meet them within a realistic time-frame, it is a good idea to call off communications.

3. Need for money. Scammers will usually invent their identity and tell you a convincing story that leads up to asking you for money. Every year numerous people are swindled out of thousands of dollars because they send money to someone they have never met but have corresponded with over the internet. These scammers will avoid meeting you face-to-face. Once again, if you can’t meet them within a realistic time-frame, call everything off.

Meeting Face-to-Face Is the Key.

Getting to know someone by e-mail and even by telephone can lead to a false sense of intimacy which causes you to let down your guard and give out too much personal information too soon. Keep in mind that your objective with online dating is to find out enough in advance to let you know if you want to meet someone. It is only through meeting them that you can begin to really get to know someone and determine when it is time to let go of your anonymity. In general, it is best to set up that first date after three or four e-mails or at most two phone calls. If the other person comes up with reasons they can’t meet – there is probably something that is not quite right. Maintain your anonymity, say farewell, and move on to find someone more trustworthy.

Gordon Scott Edwards is the author of the memoir Internet Safari, Finding Love Online at 65. More online dating tips for senior citizens can be found on his website at http://www.gordonscottedwards.com. Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Gordon_Edwards

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